Playing over the internet using cash on one of the free poker sites can be pleasing but can also take its toll. This article aims to give you a variety of ideas to keep the game refreshing, ok it's an alternative guide!
1. Once prefrontal lobe pressure has built up due too an excess of wishing on the river, nip to the kitchen and grab the nearest tea cosy and place it on your head. This will disperse the pressure around your skull, as well as keep you warm.
2. When playing Online Poker on a laptop. If you become worried that your unmentionables are beginning to cook, ask your partner if they would kneel in front of you and gently blow between your thighs. They will also make a handy footrest.
For the sci-fi fans out there, I suggest wrapping yourself head to toe in tin-foil as this will also stop opponents and uso's intercepting your thoughts.
3. When suffering finger cramp from obsessive bluffing, swap hands and rest your playing finger in a pot of low fat yoghurt. Allow five minutes to soothe then continue. Eat yoghurt at a later date.
4. A late night game or after a good few hours you may start to drift off and hear the land of nod calling. The best method of staying awake is to smash a six inch heavy duty nail into the wall directly behind you. You then need to wedge a few stacks of cards below the front of your front two chair legs to make the chair unsteady. You can now rest assured that if you do nod off you will fall back straight into the nail and probably never wake up again- now there's an incentive!
5. After a long period of time sitting down and playing you will eventually have back pain- a good solution is to pinch your checks several times which will not only give you a nice blush effect it will also give you something else to think about!
I have developed these methods myself, and I assure you they work. Remember: Tea Cosy. Blowing. Tin Foil. Yoghurt. Sellotape. Pinch.
Just like Gran use to say 'free poker is fun dear' but when you get online Poker fatigue you need to stop or take drastic action!
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